porn for the pain, hawthorn for the heartaches

Today, we have so many many pills for so many many things. There's stuff for preventing HIV, for psychological conditions and as I have just learnt, we now have a forgetting pill.

I wished it worked on me, but unfortunately the pill specifically targets only traumatic experiences, like rape or war. You don't forget that you were raped of course, you simply forget what it feels like to be raped, which apparently makes affective issues more easier. Not like the 'pop a pill and forget the last X minutes of your life where X is the dosage in miligrams' usage that I quite imagined but cool nonetheless.

How does the forgetting pill work? Apparently to remember something, you need to strengthen it. When we experience something traumatic, adrenalin rushes through our body and strengthens the memory. So our dear pill works by blocking the production of adrenalin. [By this same token, if you have an exam, you could try hanging on a cliff and studying]

I can easily think of so many things we need pills for.

How about a pill for loneliness? Right, we have ecstasy. How about a pill for what happens after the ecstasy wears off? And another one for when that goes off too.

Or a pill that makes you just know things. You would pop it and then realize you shouldn't really be eating this pill in the first place.

Let's make a pill to cure gayness. Conversely, we can have a pill that induces it. Imagine, being gay on demand. Why? Because in certain situations, it's good to be gay. For the rest, we can just pop a pill.

Bryan would really like a pill that induces orgasms. No comment.

We could have a pill to makes people fall head over heels for you. Money seems to be losing its sheen these days.

And this is my personal request: a pill that gives you broadband internet connection upon consumption. Don't ask me how it's supposed to work. I need internet connection.

How about a pill that prevents one from hoping? Or a pill that cures stupidity? Actually they could be the same pill 'cuz only the stupid hope.

I think we could really use a pill to stop us from ever eating pills.

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I think it's so cool to just pop a pill and have sadness, or loneliness or insecurity or uncertainty or whatever unbearable negative emotion just vanish. It would make life so much more livable. Vincent Van Gogh certainly wouldn't have ended his life and would have gifted the world with much more beauty.

But would Vincent have been brilliant without his pain? I would like to think not.

I like to think that pain makes us human because pain differentiates us from other animals, from other people. No one is going to care about our own pain but us. How we transcend our own pain makes us a better person, because we made ourselves.

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Want a pill of happiness? Take arsenic.